I feel a sense of loss. When the pandemic was in full force, I was better at conscious self care, doing yoga, connecting with people, making art and art objects. Now, now I feel like I can’t keep anything consistent and that constant change is my constant companion with so few stable touchstones. I have come to loathe the popular ideas of self care. I want to be able to participate in a practice that has a constant, some kind of pythagorean theorem for my malaise.